Beyond Grateful

I am so grateful for everything lately and happier than I have been in so many years. It feels like I am getting a fresh start, that things are starting to make sense and I have a sense of life, sense of calm, sense of purpose again. I’ve slowly crawled out of my depression and into meaningful work, connections and friendships.

I’ve been at my job 2.5 weeks now and I love it! I’ve already gotten so much stuff done and it feels like I’ve been there for months. I feel comfortable with everyone, I feel intellectually and creatively stimulated and I feel good and energized when I leave work.  The other day, I found out a true miracle happened. I found out that 200 people applied for my position and they only interviewed three people. AND I GOT THE JOB. I got the job without having any of their “required” technical skills. I’ve heard many times that organizations are looking for the best cultural fit, not necessarily the perfect skill-set. If you would have told me that a year ago, I would have laughed, called you a liar and said “yeah, right”.

NOW I KNOW IT’S TRUE! I don’t know if it happens often, but it’s true. All along they said I was their top candidate and they followed through with that. I can hardly believe the irony. This is a job I nearly didn’t apply for. I spent 20 minutes total on the cover letter and resume. I nixed my overused templates, wrote from my heart and experience and somehow the lack of time worked in my favor.

I am now realizing some of my faults, in my two-year battle to find meaningful work. Up until this point, if I didn’t have all of the skills for a job, I wouldn’t apply. I was talking to a friend the other day and she said, “Men apply for any job they think they can do, regardless if they have the required skills. Women don’t do that as much”. In my case, it was true. I had always second-guessed myself. I had always said, what’s the point if they require certain skills. I had internalized some humdrum, job malaise and I convinced myself that I wasn’t good enough.

Due to the small miracle that has occurred, I know to never put limits on myself. Regardless of what certain things say, people at the end of the day are flexible.  Personality can win a lot of points, it turns out. This whole experience has been mind blowing, proving what I didn’t think possible and giving me what I never expected. It’s nice to feel respected and have collaborators that value your talents and interests. I love this organization, because they are people based, not numbers based.

I still have some psychological baggage to deal with, but right now, it’s on a layover.  I am getting control back of my feelings, and soon enough, my finances! I can’t wait to start putting more towards my debt and continue this journey towards debt freedom.  I am so grateful for this new career, my love, my family, my friends and everyone who reads this lil blog of mine. I haven’t grown it as much I as I want, but sometimes you go at the pace you are ready for.

Thanks for all your support and fantastic comments lately! I hope you are all having a relaxing Memorial Day weekend. I am side-hustling all weekend, but will get a break on Monday.